Zookeepers, conservationists, and animal lovers have been tweeting consumer review style reviews of animals in their care, and the results are hilarious. The hashtag #rateaspecies has been taking Twitter by storm.

Rating Animals: The Cute

This is fantastic, Mr. Fox! Who can resist a fuzzy fellow doing a face plant in the snow? But it’s not a mistake. This guy has spotted prey beneath the snow, and this is how he’s going to get it.

Foxes are amazing as far as animals go. They have dog-like hearing and smell, and catlike reflexes. Here’s a video of another fox catching field mice in the dead of winter. And he’s doing a pretty good job of it!

And cute doesn’t only come in mammal packaging. Get a load of this adorable little critter. Not just adorable, though. It also eats cockroaches and comes with a self-healing tail. Looks like a win-win.

And what list of cute animals (and fowl) would be complete without a penguin? This dapper chappie can sing, dance, and wear his wing tag like million dollar bling.

Boopable snout and seafood catching expertise for the win!

Rating Animals: Product Not as Expected

The echidna, like the platypus, is a monotreme — that is, an egg-laying mammal. But if you were expecting something else in your Amazon package, this spiny specimen might be quite a surprise!

And speaking of surprises….

The spotted hyena is one of a number of species of animals where the females have a pseudo-penis. That is, lady parts that look like man parts. And, just in case you thought the weirdness had ended, here comes another monotreme.

Best to stick with the original version of badger, it appears. The honey badger update doesn’t seem to work well with any other unit. In addition, it has bugs.

Rating Animals: The Useful

We would disagree with this reviewer. These fossilized diatoms may no longer be able to photosynthesize, but they have literally thousands of other uses. First, if you grind them up, you can make toothpaste or metal polish. Second, they make a terrific insecticide.  In addition, they can help with filtration. They can also help blood to clot. The buyer needs to read the directions!

Here’s someone who knows how to find the bright side of an unexpected delivery. Ordered a Roomba. Received a vulture. Would buy again anyway.

Here’s someone who actually read the product description before firing off an angry review. These fish are just here to look pretty — not to win some kind of swimming competition. Geez!

A word of caution: this is a high-quality sloth bear, but it’s still a bear. If it says ‘bear’ on the box, be aware. You’re getting a bear. Be prepared.

Rating Animals: Value for Money

These deals on animals are smokin’. Get ’em while they’re hot!

Unadvertised special! Look at these cute little guys with the big, huge eyes. They’re two for one!

Hardy, fast, and fuel efficient. Lots of bang for your big cat buck.

Agile urban model. The customer is very pleased.

Everyone Seems to Agree on This One

First, they destroy the furniture. Then they make a huge mess. As a result…look at this place!

The Most Dangerous Game. The most rapacious predator. The most destructive invasive species on record. Guess who?


Featured Image is CC0 by ABA63, via Pixabay.

Support us!

If you like this site please help and make click on the button below!

Pin It on Pinterest